So it is time to update.  I wrote a long message down below here....  :)  Should have made a new blog!

Yes; life goes on.  It has a tendency to do that.  It starts where God chooses and ends accordingly.  Not in our hands.  It all seems long and the curves are many.  :)  Curves ...I have had a few....are plentiful right now.  Sewer issues in the house...basement if you will....waiting for the contractor.  Temporary fix in place, old cat had surgery, furnace needed repairs.  All these in the same month and all quite expensive.  Good thing I already said that Christmas is to be simpler this year (understatement).  I did decree a couple years ago that I Have decided each family birthday should be big...and that Christmas is to be about others....not ourselves.  In other words, focus on what we as individuals and a family can do for others.

My big issue right now is "how to family with adult family".  I say that I did not really experience and definitely did not experience well "adult relationships" in my life with adult relatives.  Distance separated from family once I was married.  There were no extended family generations in the lives of my boys and I have little to emulate in that regard.  So too often I feel like I am winging it.  Along with the "tatoo":  "Does not play well with others" that I should have had at birth...I probably should have had one to the effect of "Lays down for others well".  :)  I mean I tend to let myself be doormatted as others would say because I am a peacemaker at heart.  I have five sons.  They are biologically/physically all adults now.  They range in age from 26 to 34 years old.  Two of them are married.  One has three children.  Two have one each. Two have none but are now in committed relationships involving no children.  Two are married.  My granddaughter who just turend seven lives with her Grampie and I.  We let her Dad live here too.  :)  My problem of late is the ones that don't liev here I don't hear from.  I don't see them.  I go months without hearing or seeing them anywhere.  Yes; they live quite locally with the exception of one.  I don't ask. I don't beg for sure.  I leave them go because rejection hurts...to oversimplify.  Their Dad's chosen activities (and I am still with him) is alot responsible for the way this family is now.  Let's say it played a big part in forming relationships we have I think.  He was a closet alcoholic for many years.  Being Mensa IQ (as are some of the boys) he was very good at it like he was/is many things.  Then he had a widowmaker and now literally has 60% of a heart (how ironic huh?) but I stayed.  I am still here.  I did alot of kicking and screaming for a few yaers but when all was said and done I am still here.  We have our differences.  There are places I would much rather be (most specifically the Fingerlakes Amish Area of NYS where I grew up close to...but suspect as years go on (life and all that) does not look good for me to get there while I am still mentally and physically competent.  :)  So all that says...what do you do with adult children who when they finally show up don't behave like a guest in your house.  Even though they grew up in your house...should they not (as longtime nonresidents) respect certain parameters and etiquette boundaries all things considered? 

So that is finally said/asked after rambling so long.  :0  I hope some of this made some sense and hit notes with some of you.  I would love to hear feedback. 

If you want to see my church updates...please read my other post from today.  It is spelled out there. I pormise to make a new "Blog" about it soon.

Mel